Category Archives: American Cuisine

Another Grand Canyon

Posted on January 23, 2013 by Mark T

Hello everyone and welcome to the 45th edition of Mastication Monologues!  Hooray for me and my wandering tastebuds!  Today I will be reviewing a relatively new restaurant that I didn’t even know existed until I was given a free burger coupon for them from my dad.  It’s called Canyons Burger Company and is located at 243 W 63rd St Westmont, IL.

Since I never really heard of this restaurant, I was walking into it without any sort of preconceived notions about their menu.  However, I was surprised at the variety of burgers and other items they served like salads and chicken tenders.  I decided to get the Blue Bayou burger since I seem to be in a Cajun state of mind as of late (see my previous post for Heaven on Seven) and a side of regular fries.  They also offered onion rings and sweet potato fries, but I didn’t feel like being that big of a fatty after coming from the gym.  Another great option that I liked was that they provided me a wide range of sauces and topping to choose from for free.  Therefore, in addition to the blue cheese and Cajun seasonings, I got ketchup, mustard, chipotle mayo, lettuce,  tomato, red onion, pickles, and sliced jalapenos piled on the burger.  Once my order was entered, they gave me a number, and eventually they brought it to my table.  It did take an unusually long time to cook my food since I was the only person in the place, but I’ll wait for food if it’s high quality.IMG_1097

Eventually my food was delivered, and upon first glance it looked quite delicious.  Once I finished taking my pictures like a weirdo, I realized that there were no blue cheese crumbles as advertised on the menu.  Instead there was a some sort of blue cheese spread coating the burger. Plus, the Cajun spices were not on the meat but rather on the cheese.  Even though it wasn’t exactly what I was expecting, I got to work on the burger.  The first bite was delicious and flavorful with each element having its own voice amid a very busy flavor profile.  The vegetables were fresh and crispy, and the beef was expertly grilled to a nice brown hue while still maintaining a good amount of juice for flavor.  I really enjoyed the jalapenos because they were fresh and not pickled.  All of which provided a crispy texture change and a spicy bite that hooked up well with the chipotle mayonnaise.  The mystery blue cheese spread worked well with its powerful flavor made spicier with the Cajun seasoning.  Even though it seemed like a real cheeseburger in paradise sans the terrible Jimmy Buffett singing, I didn’t enjoy the fact that the bottom bun seemed to disappear quicker than the top one.  This became a serious problem towards the end of the burger when the chipotle mayo threatened the integrity of my burger through its own slippery yet savory self.  Thankfully I possessed the dexterity to keep the burger intact, but I wish the bread they used was a bit more substantial.  Taste-wise, it was ideal with a slightly buttery taste to bring out the richness of the beef but not overwhelming the other ingredients.   As for the fries, it was a substantial amount for the price I paid, but it was not a case of quantity over quality.  In my case, I prefer my fries to be on the softer side, so these golden-brown sticks were modicums of delectability.  Plus, they were not overly salted/seasoned which drives me crazy sometimes like with the oft-praised Five Guys Cajun Fries that are seasoned into oblivion.  By the time I finished the fries, I was thoroughly satisfied with the meal.

So if you’re looking for a burger place beyond the clown, the king, and that red-headed girl, try Canyons Burger Company!

Canyons Burger Company on Urbanspoon

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If You Can Stand the Heat, Come Into This Kitchen

Posted on January 21, 2013 by Mark T

Bonjou to everyone out there in the blogosphere!  Welcome to another edition of Mastication Monologues where I review restaurants and recount any funny/interesting happenings along the way.  Today I will be reviewing Heaven on Seven which is located at 224 S. Main Street, Naperville, IL 60540.

For those who have never heard of this establishment, it serves mainly creole/Cajun food.  What this means is that the food can be found mainly in/around New Orleans/Louisiana.  In every recipe you can see influences which reflect the diversity and history of the area from which this food comes.  In one dish, there can be Spanish spices, African vegetables, and it’s all prepared using French cooking techniques.  Another important element of Cajun cuisine the presence of extra spicy eats which I naturally gravitated to when looking over the menu.  When we first walked into the building, it seemed like it was Mardi Gras with streamers passing overhead throughout the entire dining room, and the entire wall of hot sauces let me know that I was in the right place.  There were also probably ten bottles of different hot sauces that ranged all the way from the more mild Tabasco sauce all the way to the colorfully named, “Ass in Space” among others…

They don't mince their words with hot sauces

They don’t mince their words with hot sauces

Along with the hot sauce bottles, we were also greeted with a free basket of sliced French bread.  It was fresh but not warm, but the accompanying spreads were both new to me.  One was honey butter which tasted like regular butter with a moderate sweet aftertaste, and the other spread was bean paste.  It was a fitting savory compliment to its sweet predecessor, but I didn’t care for it much.  The waitress also provided us with a side of free pickles with mustard seeds and onions.  I preferred this hybrid salad over the bread because the cucumbers were not completely pickled and interacted with the semi-bitter mustard seeds to create an almost sweet aftertaste.  It was a bizarre mix of textures and competing flavors that somehow worked.IMG_1088 We started the meal off with the Hot As A Mutha appetizer which consisted of a habanero chile stuffed with chihuahua cheese and surrounded by peach puree and peach salsa.  Personally, I didn’t think it was worth the money since they only give you one gigantic pepper, but the presentation was somewhat elegant as the diced peaches and light dusting of cayenne pepper on the plate offset the cumbersome-looking pepper in the middle of the display.  They didn’t pull any punches with the habanero since they left the seeds in the pepper, and the cheese was plentiful/tasty.  I also appreciated the integration of peaches with the habanero because they provided a cooling, sweet snap of the flavor whip to keep the roaring spiciness lioness at bay.IMG_1092

For my main entrée, I chose the Po’ Boy sandwich with the Angry Chicken option which came along with a cup of gumbo. IMG_1094 The gumbo was quite hearty and topped with a mini-mound of white rice that was steamed to perfection.  I never had an andouille gumbo, but this concoction was perfect with a dash of Tabasco Habanero since it really brought out the spiciness of the sausage.  IMG_1095As for my sandwich, it was kind of hard to actually eat as a sandwich because the contents were too overwhelming for the bread.  So, I had to cut the chicken into small pieces and use each piece of lightly toasted baguette as an individual sandwich.  As for its spiciness, I don’t know if my tastebuds are dead from so many years of eating really spicy food, but it really was not that spicy.  I even put on some extra hot sauce to give it a bigger kick, but I was disappointed in the spice factor.  However, the chicken breading was crunchy and had a great blend of savory spices.  The meat was succulent and plentiful.  The accompanying lettuce and tomatoes did not add much to the dish, and the latter were grainy.  I think this is due to them being out of season.  I finished with it quite quickly which shocked our waitress when I told her it wasn’t even spicy.  She looked a bit frightened and informed me of these spicy dinners they do for people who love spicy food.  Looks like I have another challenge on my hands for another day!

So if you’re looking for a little slice of the spicy, deep-fried Dirty South north of the Mason Dixon line, check out Heaven on Seven.

Heaven on Seven on Urbanspoon

Heaven On Seven in Naperville on Foodio54

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Champpion of Burgers? Not Quite

Posted on January 8, 2013 by Mark T

Hello to everyone out there in the blogosphere to another edition of Mastication Monologues!  Today I am going to be talking about a restaurant that I had been to before, but I never really tried their take on a classic type of burger.  The restaurant I’m referring to is Champps Americana Restaurant located at 2301 Fountain Square Drive Lombard, IL.

The establishment is a typical American sports bar, but I did see an item on their menu that played to one of my culinary weaknesses:  spicy food.  Now I have proclaimed my spice tolerance in previous blog posts, so I won’t go into much detail about my Man versus Food-esque type adventures.  However, I did see the Firehouse Burger which was calling to me like a spicy south of the border senora.  Vale, vengo ahorita, mi amor!  I got it well-done (I know many meat-lovers will call me a savage for “burning” my meat), and it looked delicious when it was presented to me.  According to the menu, I was face to face with probably a half-pound mound of beef festooned with red and yellow bell peppers, green chiles, poblano peppers, onions, Chipotle Tabasco, Cajun seasoning, pepperjack cheese, and fresh jalapeno peppers.  These various ingredients separated this burger in my mind from other typical spicy burgers I’ve tried in the past.

Disregard the sweet potato fries and put in delicious waffle fries

Disregard the sweet potato fries and insert delicious waffle fries

Plus, it was accompanied with a mini-molehill of waffle fries.  When I started on the burger, I had to slice it in half because I put everything on it, and I can’t unhinge my jaw like a python swallowing a baby hippo.  Upon first bite, I realized that I was in for a messy time because they seemed to have doused the bun with Tabasco which in turn led the bun to become quite soggy.  Naturally, my originally firm grasp of the burger deteriorated into a melange of cheese and peppers.  Thankfully the extra gooey and tasty pepper jack managed to hold it all together like some type of magical dairy rubber cement.  So this detracted from the meal’s greatness, and the mild bell and poblano peppers really didn’t do much for the burger.  Sure, they added vibrant colors to the general beige background of a hamburger, but they were mushed into the background.  However, the jalapenos were game-changers because not only did their vibrant verdant hue brighten up the plate, but their crisp texture and loud flavor allowed the true spice of the burger shine above the general muck of mild peppers.  Once I finally demolished my main entree, I began chipping away at the waffle fries which were not quite golden brown but were still crunchy on the outside and fluffy white on the inside with minimal salt=perfect fries.

No CTA pass necessary for this deliciousness

No CTA pass necessary for this deliciousness

Afterward, I found out that they had a drink special (I don’t know if it’s everyday or not) where I could get a pint of certain beers for only $2.50!  That is quite good for the Chicago suburbs for those of you who are unaware.  I decided to pick a pint of Goose Island’s Green Line.  It’s a pale ale that has a golden hue, and I could smell a slight citrusy aroma wafting toward me during every sip.  There was a clear bitter, hoppy bite to the brew, but it was not overwhelming like other IPAs.  If you’re looking for stronger tasting beers, this would be the equivalent of sticking your toe in the swimming pool to see if you’re ready to do a cannonball into the wonderful world of beer tasting.

So if you’re looking for some interesting burgers or great drink deals, head on down to Champps!  It’s not quite the m.v.p. of sports bars, but I think if they work on the fundamentals they could be in the pantheon of greats.

Champps Americana on Urbanspoon

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No Sticky Wickets

Posted on January 8, 2013 by Mark T

Hello everyone to another edition of Mastication Monologues!  Today I will be doing a brief review of a restaurant where I tried something that I didn’t really expect to find on their menu.  The restaurant in question is Wickets Bar and Grill located at 601 N Martingale Rd (at Woodfield Rd)  Schaumburg, IL 60173.

I was meeting some college friends there just to catch up on things, and I didn’t know really what to expect from this establishment.  Based off the name, I would have thought that we were going to be eating in an imitation English gastropub of some sort due to the cricket reference in the title.  Instead, I walked into a very sleek sports bar that did not have a single Guinness poster anywhere or a cricket bat on the wall.  The menu did have the usual litany of bar food items like nachos and burgers, but I began to see a pattern emerging that was downright confusing.  Wickets offers different types of samosas for appetizers, a chicken tikka sandwich, and tandoori chicken skewers.  Why was Indian  food on a sports bar menu?  My friend and I hypothesized that there was one Indian master chef who was called upon to make these delicious treats from his homeland.  Either that or it was a nod to the popularity of cricket in South Asia and other British colonies.  Menu construction theories aside, I decided to go for the two skewer platter and a Lagunitas Little Sumpin’ Sumpin’ Ale to drink.IMG_1080

I had already had this particular brew from Lagunitas before, but I knew that I couldn’t go wrong with this choice.  If you haven’t had it before, it is an amber-colored beer with a clear hoppy taste that covers your palate initially, but at the end it gives you a little smooth sum sumpin’ at the end that makes you always come back for more.  If you enjoy IPAs, I would recommend this beer to you.

Stomach don't fail me now!

Stomach don’t fail me now!

As for my entrée, I went with one skewer of beef with vegetables and the other with chicken tikka tandoori with vegetables.  They were both served on a bed of basmati rice infused with herbs which was surrounded by golden flatbread triangles.  Plus, I decided to get the cucumber chive yogurt sauce that was served on the side.  Taken all together, these skewers were on point in terms of quantity and quality.  If you are not really hungry, then you will take some of this home with you.  The basmati rice with herbs was cooked to perfection, and the herbs provided the starch with whispers of rosemary and parsley.   I used the flatbread wedges as pseudo-pizza slices to put the yogurt sauce on like sauce and then piled on the meat and rice which gave the meal an Indian vibe since I was eating with my hands which I always enjoy.  The Tandoori chicken was actually quite tasty since it tasted exactly like the same dish I tried in some of the Indian restaurants I visited in London.  If you never had Tandoori chicken, it is a type of specially cooked chicken coated with the right blend of cumin, turmeric, chili, and a slightly charred aftertaste.  The beef was equally delectable since it was grilled completely through but still quite succulent.  As for the veggies, it was a mix of mushrooms, green and yellow zucchini, bell peppers, and onions.  All were adequately grilled, but they still maintained their original integrity which I enjoyed since sometimes over-grilling can lead to crumbling in  vegetables with higher water content.  Finally, the yogurt sauce was like mix between tzatziki and the Indian raita; the neutral yogurt element provided a cooling element to the slightly spicy tandoori chicken  and the cucumbers and chives provided a texture change that interacted nicely with the semi-crispy flatbread.

Overall, I was stuffed and a satisfied customer.  So if you’re looking for some delicious Indian influenced food in a very non-Indian environment, come on down to Wickets Bar and Grill!

Wickets Bar & Grill on Urbanspoon

Wickets Bar and Grill on Foodio54

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Posted in American Cuisine, Barbecue, Burgers, Chicken Wings, Comfort Food, Indian, Middle Eastern/Mediterranean Cuisine, Pizza, Southeast/Southern Asia Cuisine and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Come On Baby Light My Fire

Posted on December 26, 2012 by Mark T

Hello to everyone out there again in the blogosphere to another installment of Mastication Monologues!  I will attempt to keep this post short and sweet since I am fighting off the effects of a food coma from a delicious grad school graduation dinner.  I ended up going to Wildfire located at 232 Oakbrook Center Oak Brook, IL 60523.

Wildfire is a Lettuce Entertain You establishment and has created a reputation as one of Chicago’s/Chicagoland’s premier American eateries.  When walking into this restaurant, it has the ambiance of a bygone era where you would expect to see the Rat Pack at the bar and the maitre d’ to offer the female patrons a cigarette to calm their nerves and keep a slim figure (For those non-smokers, thankfully the smooth, bold flavor infused part of that aforementioned bygone era is gone).  Anyway, we sat down at a booth that had a perfect view of the dining room, and we were immediately welcomed by our waitress with a complementary plate of breads.  One mini-loaf was an airy, buttery poppy-seed and onion concoction that was delectable, and the other, more globular loaf was a dark pumpernickel with both light and dark raisins.  Personally, I preferred the onion bread to the pumpernickel, but the latter tasted more like a dessert type of bread due to the presence of fruit and nuts in the bread.  Either way you cut it, they both were the best thing since sliced bread.IMG_1057

As for my main course, I went with the Eight Hour Barbecue Platter.  It was the Dinner Special for Wednesday nights, and I feel like the name comes from the amount of time it should take a normal person to finish all of the food.  However, I usually am hungrier than the average bear, so I naturally destroyed my meal in no time.IMG_1060 Now I know that the picture does not do the meal justice since it isn’t the most aesthetically pleasing plate, but it truly was a meal of kings.  I started off with the pulled pork (right hand side, in front of the corn muffin) that literally melted in my mouth with a smoky, southern twang aftertaste.  After I finished that mini-mound of pork paradise, I moved on to the sliced brisket (left side of plate) which still possessed a similar savory personality but was a bit on the dry side.  The baby back ribs were a mere afterthought at this point, but the meat was perfectly seasoned and fell of the bone which made eating them a breeze.  I’m not the biggest fan of beans in general, and the beans they served me were no exception to my dislike.  They weren’t terrible since they were simmering in the same barbecue sauce they used for the different meats, but they really did not bring anything different to the meal aside from a change in texture.  Nevertheless, I was glad that I left the cornbread muffin for last because it was a sweet, bright yellow beacon of fluffy goodness shining through the shadows of the barbecue smoke.  For dessert, we ended up getting an apple crumble which made my inhibitions crumble as I proceeded to tear down its caramel coated ice cream dome and combine it with its graham cracker and apple pie filling like some sort of confectionery hungry Godzilla.  If you love apple pie or apple/cinnamon anything, I highly recommend this dessert, but remember to save some room for this monster.IMG_1061

So if you’re looking for a classy restaurant for a power lunch, a special dinner, or just a great place to catch up with friends and colleagues, check out Wildfire!

Wildfire Oak Brook on Urbanspoon

Wildfire on Foodio54

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Apart of Something Delicious

Posted on December 17, 2012 by Mark T

Hello to everyone out there in the blogosphere!  Welcome to another edition of Mastication Monologues where I review various restaurants, and let everyone know whether or not it’s worth it to spend your money at said establishments.  Today, I will be talking about a pizzeria in Chicago that I never even heard of until my friend said she had a Groupon, and my stomach was telling me, “Hey ya mook, fill me up with something!”  So, we decided to go to Apart Pizza located at  5624 North Broadway, Chicago, IL.

Humble digs, delicious pies

Humble digs, delicious pies

Now in Chicago, how pizza is made is a point of personal preference and pride when talking to outsiders.  Obviously, we have our arguments with New Yorkers about who has better pizza, and the best thing that Los Angeles has to offer in the pizza world is California Pizza Kitchen…no comment.  However, for the uninitiated to the NY vs. Chicago pizza polemic, it basically boils down to this:  crust.  Classic New York pizza is cut in slices and is paper-thin while Chicago has thicker, crunchier crust and can be cut in slices or squares (a.k.a. “Party Cut” if you really want to sound like a local).  However, Chicago also has its signature deep dish pizza which is like a thick pie of sauce and cheese, and it will fill you up after two slices.  Anyway, I’m a firm believer in the overall superiority of Chicago pizza to New York pizza simply based off of the variety we have, but I guess it’s like comparing apples and oranges.  I’ll let you be the judge.

Moving on from culinary debates, we walked into their very unassuming storefront to find a tiny dining room with only three tables in it.  If you are planning on coming there with a large group, I would recommend taking advantage of their free delivery services.  I ordered the Pollo Tuscano pizza, and my friend ordered the Queen Margherita.  I was surprised when it came out because it turns out that it was New York style with very thin, floppy slices, but I still greatly enjoyed my pizza. It was festooned with chicken, mushrooms, onions, roasted red peppers, and small cubes of Feta cheese.  Once I let the blazing pie cool off, I proceeded to chow down on its golden crust that was lightly dusted with flour.  The cheese to sauce ratio was pretty evenly proportion and taste-wise and allowed for the sweet peppers to do a lively tarantella with the bold tasting onions and  fresh Feta cheese.  As for the chicken, it was a bit on the dry side, so I think it could have been better if they perhaps used shredded chicken instead of the cubes.  Plus, the mushrooms were pretty much a non-factor, so I don’t know why they even put them on the pizza.   My friend’s Queen Margherita was a classic pie with fresh tomatoes, buffalo mozzarella, and basil leaves.  It was very thin, light, and fresh like the queen this type of pizza was named after, and it’s always a solid choice for those vegetarians out there.

Che Bella!

Che Bella!

So if you’re looking for a slice of Big Apple pizza while visiting the Windy City or are tired of the gut busting proportions of a Giordanos deep dish pizza, try out Apart Pizza!  It truly is a star on Broadway.

Apart Pizza on Urbanspoon

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Grilled Cheese That’s Sure to Please

Posted on November 19, 2012 by Mark T

Hello everyone, and welcome to another addition to Mastication Monologues!  The time has been flying by as of late which I blame on the advancement of Christmas advertisements and the Daylight Savings Time.  However, last night I managed to slow down and enjoy a great meal at a new establishment that serves a childhood favorite with a twist.  I am talking about The Big Cheese which is located at 4229 North Lincoln Avenue, Chicago, IL 60618.

I had actually saw in the Redeye (a local free newspaper in Chicago) that a new restaurant that specialized in grilled cheese sandwiches had opened up.  The Redeye’s restaurant reviewer had mostly good things to say about it aside from one of his/her sandwiches not being completely melted.  The same was said about the lack of melted cheese on Yelp. Nevertheless, I had to go and see what all of the fuss was about since it combines two of my favorite food groups, bread and cheese.  When my friend and I got there around 6:50 p.m., the interior was dark and the staff was just sitting there.  It turns out that their hours of operation on the internet and their sign were incorrect.  They had just closed.  However, they still let us in even though we felt bad for imposing.  To make up for our troubles, the very hospitable owner, Mike, hooked us up with a free plate of fried pickles.  They were pretty good for a little something to nibble on before the main event.  The actual breading was a bit flaky, but its buttery taste complimented the sour crunch of the pickle quite nicely.  Plus, it was served with a small cup of Ranch dressing to provide a cool tang for the palate.

Don’t judge a pickle by its breading

For my actual sandwich, I chose the Diablo Rojo (Red Devil for those who don’t habla espanol).  This was a muy picante twist on the grilled cheese.  The actual sandwich contained Toluca style chorizo, grilled jalapenos, and Chihuahua cheese, and it was all served on a Ciabatta bun.  When I bit into it, it was like a fiesta in my mouth y toda la familia was invited.  The chorizo was plentiful and was bursting with cumin and chili notes which provided an exquisite compliment to the smoky jalapeno flavor.  Unfortunately, the cheese was overshadowed by the two aforementioned elements, but it provided a glue to hold all of the contents together within the sandwich.  As for the Ciabatta roll, that was an improvisation by the cooks since they were out of regular bread, but I would recommend that they serve it on this type of bun.  It was fresh and crusty but sturdy enough to handle all of those contents without crumbling under the pressure.  With every sandwich, you can also order either soup or fries.  I ordered the fries, but they also gave me a bowl of their tomato basil soup.

A sandwich sandwiched between two killer sides

The fries were golden straws of deliciousness that were lightly powdered with Parmesan cheese, a welcomed variation that really popped with cheesy goodness when eaten with ketchup.  As for the soup, I’m not a huge crouton fan, but the actual soup was delectable.  It was a creamy sunset orange that tasted like a rich marinara sauce which also doubly served as a dipping sauce for my sandwich (a move I highly recommend).

Overall, the ambiance of the place was quite laid back, and the service provided by the server, staff, and owner was very warm like one of their signature creations.  So head on out to the Big Cheese for a little slice of paradise!

The Big Cheese On Lincoln on Urbanspoon

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Going Out With A Bang

Posted on November 9, 2012 by Mark T

‘Ello everyone!  Welcome to another edition of Mastication Monologues.  I am currently writing this while rocking a food baby to sleep on this cold November evening.  Even though I may have had a bit of a rough day today, I still managed to have a dinner that chased away the blues and the cool weather.  I ended up going out to a British gastropub called Chequers located at 100 West Burlington Avenue  La Grange, IL 60525.

At first I had looked up some reviews on Yelp to see what exactly I should expect from this restaurant, and I did not see many good comments.  Now, I did take these reviews with a grain of salt since some foodies out there are quite demanding of establishments, and the British aren’t known for their culinary prowess.  However, I was pleasantly surprised.  Upon walking through the doors, I was greeted with a beefeater cutout and plenty of kitschy 19th century pictures of England and advertisements for travel, beer, and stereopticons(well, maybe not that last one).  The service was very prompt, and the actual interior was quite cozy for a winter night.  To drink, I went with a Blue Moon Harvest Pumpkin Ale since it was on special, and I do love my pumpkin flavored items aside from the pumpkin lattes or whatever they are at Starbucks.

A fine brew for a bite

I know I’m going to get a lot of hate mail from that statement, but c’est la vie.  Anyway, the actual beer was quite tasty.  It had an orange amber hue that embodied a light, spicy flavor with a slight pumpkin aftertaste with every sip.  It provided a classy undertone to the overtures of our larger than life appetizers:  onion rings and Welsh rarebit.

Appetizers fit for Godzilla

The former was pretty straight forward in terms of presentation since there are only so many ways one can cut up onions and fry them.  However, these rings were literally big enough to be worn as bracelets.  Even though these monstrous rings could serve as earrings for Shaq, their taste was equally large.  The breading was crisp and buttery and thankfully not very greasy.  The accompanying sauce was a tasty spicy ranch with a horseradish and black pepper foundation.  With the latter appetizer, the Welsh rarebit, I have always wondered of what it consisted?  For the longest time, I would think that it involved rabbit meat in some form since “rarebit” looks similar when glanced at very quickly.  However, I would cross off another food on my bucket list since I found out that it is the rough English equivalent of fondue sans the forks and mini-pot of cheese.  Instead, it is a small casserole dish of melted Cotswold cheese (the very same that people chase in the Cotswold Games), stout, mustard, and Cayenne pepper.  This spread was then supposed to be eaten on the toast points provided with the dish, and the bread was a wheat rye that was nicely toasted.  The melted cheese was quite smooth and savory, akin to a Gouda, while I could taste the hearty stout mingling with the semi-sweet mustard.  ‘Twas good to say that I had it, but I don’t know if I would get it again.

Shhh! Don’t wake the sausages

Once we managed to somehow destroy these two appetizers (it was mainly me), I got down to business with my main dish:  bangers and mash.  Now I know that there are certain Britishisms that make Americans go tee-hee, i.e. fags, bangers, and rubbers (translations:  cigarettes, sausages, and erasers), but this meal made my stomach go tee-hee with how delicious it was.  First, the sausages were roasted in a stone ground mustard sauce that still had the seeds in it which was a nice rustic touch.  Its semi-sweet/acidic yellow mustard taste complimented the pork based sausage perfectly.  As for the sides, the mash was smoother than Cool Whip and somehow incredibly buttertastic without having an entire irrigation system of Land O’ Lakes extending slowly across my plate.  The steamed vegetables were pretty pedestrian, but they were adequately prepared.  It was a hodgepodge of cauliflower, broccoli, zucchini, and carrots.

By the time we finished, the pumpkin bread pudding for dessert was a long way away in my mind.  I had bigger problems to deal with like attempting to maintain consciousness on the border of a food coma.  So if you’re looking for a slice of jolly old England with an American twist in regard to portion sizes, cheque out Chequers!

Chequers on Urbanspoon

Chequers of Lagrange on Foodio54

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The Fattest Steak in the West

Posted on October 27, 2012 by Mark T

Howdy, y’all!!  Welcome to another edition of Mastication Monologues.  Today I bring you an entry that truly lives up to its culinary heritage and more.  This week I went to Longhorn Steakhouse out in the Chicago suburbs located at 708 North Janes Avenue  Bolingbrook, IL 60440.

Roy Rogers’ home away from home

I didn’t really have much of an opinion of this restaurant before visiting it due to the fact that the number of steakhouses we have in Chicago/the Chicagoland area is simply a reflection of our long-term infatuation with the perfect slice of meat.  At one point, Chi-town was known more colorfully as the “Butcher for the World” where according to the Chicago Tribune, “At the (stock)yards’ peak in 1924, more than 18.6 million cattle, hogs and sheep passed through that labyrinth.”  However, even though our abattoirs have long left the city limits, Longhorn Steakhouse is an homage to meat, Texas-style.  Upon walking into the door, I felt like I walked into Rattlesnakes steakhouse on King of the Hill.  There was plenty of country music pumping through the sound system and half a head of cattle festooning the walls alongside beautiful landscape oil paintings of Texas.  While our waiter mumbled his way through a standard greeting, he supplied us with a complimentary bread basket.  It seemed to be a wheat, possibly honey wheat, boule that was pre-sliced and served with butter.  I wished they’d give us warmer butter than the cold sphere nestled in its black cup, but the hot bread melted it in a jiffy.  For my main meal, I ordered the Parmesan crusted chicken which came with a side salad and a side.

This is your heart on cholesterol

The salad was pretty tasty especially since they had chipotle ranch.  It added a great zing to a classic dressing, and the greens were a mix of lettuce, purple cabbage, kale, and peppers.  I’m not a huge crouton fan, so I was somewhat annoyed with their prodigious numbers inhabiting the bowl.  I think I already had my fill of bread with the aforementioned basket, thank you.  Anyway, when my main course came out, I was definitely intimidated.  The common phrase about Texas is that everything’s bigger, and this plate was no different.  Instead of tucking into the chicken straight away, I decided to sample a bit of the mashed potatoes first.  I’m surprised they weren’t rocking a questionable haircut and an Armani suit because they were richer than Donald Trump.  The texture was creamy yet maintained some tasty chunks of potato, and butter cascaded down these gentle white slopes.  As for the chicken, it made my heart race…for the wrong reason.  From the very first mouthful, I could not get over the intensely rich Parmesan crust and cheese sauce which blotted out any trace of the chicken.  However, the actual chicken was quite tender even though it tasted like I was gnawing on a block of cheese.  If you have high cholesterol, avoid this dish, and if you don’t and really really love the taste of cheese, only then I’d recommend this meal.  Next time, I’d probably just get a lean steak to avoid this fatty conundrum.

So if you’re looking for a small piece of stereotypical Texas, mosey on down to Longhorn Steakhouse.  Happy Trails!

Longhorn Steakhouse on Urbanspoon

LongHorn Steakhouse on Foodio54

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Posted in American Cuisine, Barbecue, Burgers, Chain Restaurants, Steakhouse and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Not the Wurst Joint I’ve Been To

Posted on October 20, 2012 by Mark T

Hello to everyone out there in the blogosphere!  Welcome to another classic restaurant review on Mastication Monologues.  Yesterday, I visited  a restaurant in Chicago that is an institution and a symbol of German-American pride in the city.  It is called The Berghoff Restaurant and is located at 17 West Adams Street  Chicago, IL 60603.

In the current landscape of restaurants in America, it seems that there is a huge demand for food that is cutting edge in terms of taste, preparation, and presentation.  Unfortunately, it has come at the expense of the classic ethnic establishments that serve old-world comfort food that may not win any beauty contests, but like Shallow Hal, diners (hopefully) realize that the beauty of these dishes lies within their heartiness, fresh ingredients, and simplicity.  The Berghoff has been in operation since 1898, and as soon as you walk through their stained glass doors you can just feel the history emanating from their rich Mahogany walls.  This connection to the past and traditions is reflected in their menu as it contains many German food staples, and there are other options for those who are not looking to get their Wienerschnitzel on (burgers, sandwiches, salads, and even Tandoori chicken).  I, however, decided to say guten tag to their slow braised drunken ox joints, and I plumped for their Oktoberfest beer to drink since it was on special.  While we were waiting, they provided us with a free bread basket that was great since it contained fresh artisan white bread, rye bread, and a baked flat-bread that had cheese baked into it.  Based off of taste, it probably was Parmesan.

Hello Liebchen

When my ox joints came out, it was tastefully displaced like a mighty meat monarch who sported a crown of sautéed julienned onions and was surrounded by his pumpkin gnocchi minions who were kowtowing to their ruler.  I didn’t waste time tucking into the ox joint, and it was an interesting experience.  First, there was a good amount of fat on one side of the meat which I didn’t mind, but it was quite hard to hold the bone in one place while trying to take the meat off.  Thankfully, the meat was tender and literally falling off the bone which made my job a lot easier.  The meat was covered in a Berghoff bourbon sauce that was like some sort of magical ambrosia that made the beef even more succulent with each bite.  However, after working like an archeologist on the joint, I found out that I was eating meat off of a vertebrae, not a joint.  I don’t know if this is a ploy to give you less meat, but it left me disappointed since a majority of my meal was bone.  Underneath the hockey puck of meat there was a delicate blanket of sautéed Swiss chard that provided a rich, spinachy bite to the savory beef.  The gnocchi were the most interesting part since they were lightly fried, firm, and had a slight pumpkin aftertaste.  Now, I know during Fall people go pumpkin-flavored product crazy, but I definitely don’t fall into that category.  Regardless of my leanings, the fact that the dumplings didn’t overwhelm me with pumpkintastic flavors left me a happy diner.  My Oktoberfest beer was definitely not for the weak stomached since it is similar to the Marzenstyle beers that they serve at the world-famous harvest festival in Germany.  Its reddish-brown hue contained a moderate bitterness that was then followed by a hop aftertaste that left me blown away at its boldness.

Ein Bier mit Attitude

So if you’re looking for eine kleine piece of Deutchland in Chicago, head down to the Berghoff Restaurant.

Berghoff on Urbanspoon

Berghoff on Foodio54

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Posted in American Cuisine, Burgers, German and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.
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