Author Archives: Mark T

There’s Nopal Like Home

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Good day or night depending on where you are in the world!  Welcome to another chapter in the Mastication Monologues saga where I managed to visit a very small but good Mexican restaurant.  Luckily I was invited to my friend Roberta’s bday party (muito obrigado!) to try the food at Los Nopales located at 4544 North Western Avenue  Chicago, IL 60625.  It is a bit of a ways away from La Villita or Pilsen, but I still recommend that you make the drive up.

First, I found out that it is a BYOB restaurant which is very nice since they’re not like other restaurants trying to push their kiddie-pool sized margarita specials onto your table with all of their marketing might.  However, there is a 3 dollar corkage fee for wine bottles and six packs and four dollars for margarita bottles, just fyi.  When I finally arrived after Google Maps gave me wrong directions, I walked in and noticed how small the establishment really is.  It is on the cramped side at times if really crowded, but the food/ambiance/staff more than make up for it.  The tortilla chips on the table were on the thinner side and perfectly fried without leaving that nasty, greazy residue that some Mexican restaurant chips leave on your fingers.  These munchies were accompanied by two different types of salsas:  one tomatillo blend which was a bit spicier than the tomato based mild salsa.  My fellow party-goers had also already ordered the chicken taquitos which were drizzled with sour cream and placed around a molehill of guacamole.  The sour cream did not do much to enhance the taste of the taquitos which were muy deliciosos.  The chicken was all white meat, and its flauta blanket was crispy and golden brown.  This appetizer was amped up by the guacamole which was really zesty with hints of lime and a nice consistency that wasn’t like caulk but not too soupy.

As for the main course, I ended up indulging in some chorizo tostadas.  The plate that came to me was an interesting land of contrasts.  A majority of the area was covered with two well-portioned tostadas topped with minced chorizo, diced tomatoes, crisp lettuce, and sour cream.  The meat was crumbly but highly seasoned with cumin and spices that really made each crispy tortilla mouthful pop.  That was another part of the tostada that really grabbed me was the fact that these tostadas were very sturdy and did not break when I was holding and eating them.  Then came a swath of yellow Mexican rice that was surprisingly different from the run of the mill orange Mexican rice that often contains peas, corn, and carrots.  Nevertheless, it was very delicious and was had a very slight buttery taste.  The only downside (although I’m negatively biased towards refried beans) was the large pool of what was supposed to be refried beans.  Whereas I have had some legitimately good frijoles, these were just sub par as the individual beans were destroyed into a muddled brown blob.  It definitely received the bronze olympic medal on this all around eating event.  At the end of the meal, we got some fried ice cream, but I only had one spoonful.  I know I can’t formulate an accurate judgement based off of this one spoonful, but the batter was pedestrian and was overshadowed by the ice cream.

Ain’t she a beaut?

So if you’re looking for that south of the border taste without having to book a flight to Oaxaca, head up north to Los Nopales in the Lincoln Square neighborhood.

Los Nopales on Urbanspoon

Los Nopales Mexican Restaurant on Foodio54

If You Like It, Then You Should Put an Onion Ring on It

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Hello everyone to another edition of Mastication Monologues.  Today I’m going to be going way back in time to an era that seems like ancient history.  The year was 2001, and unfortunately there was no space odyssey involved.  I had just suffered a life threatening injury to my neck, but the family and I still ended up going on vacation to Memphis, Tennessee since I wasn’t going to have surgery for another month.  So we took in the typical tourist sites like Graceland and Beale Street before the beautification movement that transformed this once dilapidated thoroughfare into a squeaky clean tourist hub.  After an entire day of seeing sparkling jumpsuits and Elvis’ personal plane emblazoned with his signature motto TCB, we started looking for a place to eat.  Little did I know that I would be Taking Care of Business at dinner that night.

An unassuming place for mutant onion rings

We ended up going to Huey’s located at  77 South 2nd Street, Memphis, TN which is the downtown location.  Upon entering, it seemed like any type of regular hometown bar with a little helping of some southern charm.  However, upon closer inspection, we noticed some unique touches to the interior of the establishment.  First, the booth, walls, and table surrounding us were covered in different types of graffiti from travelers who had made the trip before us.  So, naturally we all left our mark with the markers that they provided us.  I then saw some other diners taking their straws and aiming them upwards towards the ceiling.  Given my injured status, I awkwardly moved my body to see that the ceiling tiles were filled like pincushions with thousands of tiny toothpicks.  We also followed suit (even though my mom accidentally shot someone at the table next to us with a toothpick), and it was a fun way to pass the time before our food arrived at our table .

Seat yourself and don’t mind the toothpicks

I ended up ordering the classic World Famous Huey Burger with a side of their onion rings.  The burger was not the be all, end all in burgerdom, but it had all of the right qualities of being in the upper echelon of sandwiches I have tried over the years.  They cooked it to perfection without charring it too much while also keeping the patty nice and juicy.  The condiments were very balanced, and the vegetables were crisp and fresh.  You also have the choice of Swiss or cheddar cheese, but I went with the cheddar and didn’t regret it.  Even though it may seem like this was a real cheeseburger in paradise (ugh, a Jimmy Buffet reference..I feel so dirty), the only downside was the bun consistency.  It needed to be a bit thicker and more durable to accommodate all of the toppings along with the meat instead of slowly deteriorating as the meal wore on.  As for my side of onion rings, that was the real show stopper.  I couldn’t believe how big these mofos were.  There seriously must have been some sort of radiation leak by the deep fryer when they made them.  However, contrary to the rumors and/or what Cosmo wants us to believe, size isn’t everything.  Even though these onion rings were insanely oversized, they were not very greasy which is a common shortcoming for onion rings.  Plus, the breading was handmade and had a rich, semi-buttery taste that enhanced the flavor profile of the onions which were red instead of the typical white.

That’s a hunka hunka delicious burger

In the end, I was greatly stuffed and quite satisfied with some good ol’ fashioned southern cookin’.  Huey’s was a great place to enjoy some good food with good company, and it’s one place that doesn’t try to cash in on Elvis’ fame.  For more info check out their website: http://hueyburger.com/

Huey's on Urbanspoon

Huey's - Downtown on Foodio54

The Delicious Bay of Pigs

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Hello to all of my fellow gourmands and gastronomes out there!  Welcome to another article of Mastication Monologues.  Today I am going to be reviewing a little place in Chicago that is considered to have the best Cuban food in the entire city.  I’m talking about 90 Miles Cafe at 2540 W. Armitage.  There is another location located at 3101 North Clybourn Avenue, but I don’t know if it’s any different from the one I went to on Armitage.  Anyway, I was surprised that we even had Cuban restaurants in Chicago given that our Mexican population is much larger than any other Hispanic group, and obviously we’re a lot farther away from Cuba than Florida.  Last time I checked, we weren’t Miami with classic 1920’s art deco hotels, white sand beaches, and a more recent scourge of the sports world *CoMiamiHeatLebronJamesugh*.  Even though my expectations were not that high coming into this establishment, I was pleasantly surprised.

First, the outside was brightly colored and even had the signature buoy one could find in Key West that proclaims its status as the southernmost point in the contiguous United States on the roof.  I loved this decoration since it brought me back to when I actually went to Key West and got my picture taken with said tourist site.  Once inside, it was a very cramped area near the entrance, but when you move towards the larger dining area, it is actually quite cozy.  It’s also byob, so we ended up bringing Casillero del Diablo which was a Cabernet Sauvignon and had hints of black cherries which elegantly complimented my meal:  puerco rostizado.

La estrella de mi cena (The star of my dinner)

When it came out, I was very excited because it definitely looked like something that you’d get in an abuelita’s kitchen in Havana.  It wasn’t the prettiest thing in the world, but I started with the roasted pork that apparently was infused with guayaba and mixed with pan-fried onions (yum!).  I’m as crazy for pan-fried onions as Tony Montana was in Scarface for da money, da power, and da women.  The pork itself was flavorful, tender, and had a slight sweet aftertaste which surprised me because I thought that the onions would overpower the guayaba.  Moving on from the main part of the entrée, I then attacked the rice and black beans like Castro’s forces against Bautista’s armies.  The rice was an average white long grain rice, but the beans were submerged in a black, pork based broth.  I wasn’t a huge fan of them being served like this, but they still were quite flavorful.  Anyway, I poured them into the rice, and it made for an interesting little goulash of sorts that I mixed with the pork on occasion.  The last item on my plate I saved till the end of the meal because I had never tried them before:  fried plantains or more commonly known as maduros (lit. “matures” or “ripes”).  I don’t know why I had never tried them before, but I was so glad that I did at 90 Miles Cafe because they were excellent.  The breading was even and slightly sweet and buttery which went along with the firm and ever so creamy texture of the plantains.

You don’t have to be a promoter of Marxism, smoke cigars, or rock a sweet beard to enjoy this cafe

So if you’re looking for an authentic slice of the forbidden island of Cuba, end your culinary embargo and head on over to 90 Miles Cafe in Chicago.

“The only things that the United States has given to the world are skyscrapers, jazz, and cocktails. That is all. And in Cuba, in our America, they make much better cocktails.”
Federico Garcia Lorca

90 Miles Cuban Cafe on Urbanspoon

90 Miles Cuban Cafe on Foodio54

The Italian Job (in Sevilla)

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Bienvenidos or Welcome to part two of my Sevilla trip.  This post is a bit on the shorter end since it only involves a treat suitable after eating some of the delicious tapas described in my previous post.  I would like to tell you about my favorite gelato place in Sevilla and the locals swear by it having the best ice cream in the entire city.  They weren’t kidding.  It is called Heladería Rayas and is located at Calle Almirante Apodaca 1.  It is right before the Plaza de Encarnación which houses a spectacular sculpture that is called Las Setas (The Mushrooms) which you can also take an elevator to the top for spectacular views of the city.  Plus, it is outside of the touristy city center which allows you to spend time with the local populace.

The scene of the crime

I had passed by this heladería (ice cream shop) many times to and from the bus station, and it always seemed to be packed with people in the afternoon and night.  Finally, one day, while seeing the city with my friend Brittney, I decided to see what all of the hubbub was about and try some.   My first taste was a cup of the Sachertorte gelato.  For those who are unaware of what a Sachertorte is, it is the signature cake of the Hotel Sacher in Vienna, Austria.  I had a slice during a day trip to Vienna in 2009, and I was hooked.  Strangely enough, the gelato managed to capture the delicate chocolately goodness that I had originally tasted one humid summer’s day in Austria.  Not only was the typically rich but not overwhelming dark chocolate flavor there, but they managed to have the apricot jelly as well.  Plus, this flavor came with its own Rayas twist as they put in some raisins to add to the overall texture of the gelato.  Not only did Las Rayas nail the quality of the traditional of the Sachertorte, but they are very generous in terms of portions.  So I assure you that you will be getting your money’s worth.

The second time around, I ended up getting another cup of gelato, but I decided to be more daring and take advantage of their three flavor option that you can do when you buy a cone or cup.  I ended up getting the beso de mujer (woman’s kiss) and the quemesabe (roughly translated as the “whatever”).  With the former, I was expecting maybe just a peck on the cheek, but the flavor was more like a French kiss: intense, enjoyable, and left me all slobbery (great visual, I know).  It was a mix of milk chocolate and hazelnut cream and pieces of actual hazelnut.  If you love Nutella, this is the flavor for you.  As for the quemesabe, it was like a potpourri of different flavors with milk chocolate, cinnamon, and lemon cake pieces all jammed together in some sort of satisfying yet chaotic gelato paradise.  It was strange though how all of the elements seemed to maintain their own individual characters, especially the lemon cake pieces since they were light and airy instead of being crumbly or soggy.

Looks so messy but tastes so good

So if you’re ever in Sevilla and looking for a satisfying end to a meal or a tasty way to cool off while taking in the city, make your way down to Las Rayas Heladería.

Buen viaje!

Take a Look at These Patatas

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Hola a todos!  Welcome to another addition of Mastication Monologues, and I hope you are ready for an international recommendation.  This past Spring Break, I wanted to go on vacation somewhere overseas.  So I ended up planning a trip to southwestern Spain with my home base in Sevilla.  I had previously travelled to Andalucia when I was living in Barcelona, but this region called me back with its charm and all things people normally associate with Spain, i.e. flamenco, bull fighting, and soccer.  It was definitely different culturally and linguistically from Catalunya.  Today, I would like to talk about my experience at Cafe de Sevilla located on the corner of Paseo de Catalina de Ribera right next to the Jardines de Murillo (Murillo Gardens).

As I was exploring the city’s many different tourist stops like the Catedral de Sevilla and the Plaza de Toros, I was also on a hunt for my favorite tapa:  patatas bravas.  If you’ve never had them, they are kind of like the Spanish version of French fries.  They are diced and fried potatoes that are served often times with a mayonnaise-based sauce with some type of tomato element and black pepper.  However, here stateside I have yet to find a tapas restaurant able to recreate this seemingly simple dish.  I don’t know if they are trying to make it fancier for American diners, but I have seen some interesting variations.  Anyway, while I visited many different restaurants and cafes in Sevilla, I found that it was nearly impossible to find my patatas bravas on the menu when in Barcelona they were quite popular.  This all changed on a walk back to my hostel when I decided to go to a restaurant right by the Murillo Gardens.

Patatas on the left and the fried cheese from a previous meal (it’s delicious as well)

It has both al fresco and indoor dining.  For my last meal in Sevilla, I dined outside on the patio, and it has a classy ambiance with their wooden tables and canvas umbrellas.  It was a perfect night for a refreshing Cruzcampo (Sevillanos are more known for their beer than wine consumption strangely enough), a plate of patatas bravas, and bull tail.  I even had a funny interaction with the waitress because apparently I used the Spanish word for tail, “rabo”, that only old people in the country use instead of the more modern “cola”.  Once I established myself as being an old country bumpkin, I was excited for my last Sevillian meal.

The patatas and the bull tail came out at the same time with the bravas having a much more exquisite presentation than the no-nonsense approach to the bull tail.   The potatoes were perfectly fried with a slightly crunchy outside and soft, white interiors.  They were drizzled with the classic, only-in-Spain patata sauce which was a bit spicier than the other varieties I have tried in other cities in Spain.  However, these were special since they also came with blue cheese sauce that was not too overwhelming with the cheese chunks floating in it, and a spicy tomato sauce that may have had saffron in it as well.  As for the bull tail, it did not look like they just took a tail from a freshly killed bull in the plaza de toros and slapped it on a plate, but rather there were three moderately-sized hunks of meat served in a beef based gravy along with a side of potato wedges.

Un”bull”ievable (I just went there)

The meat itself was very tender, almost like brisket, and I didn’t even need a knife to cut any of it off the bones.  As for the gravy, it went very well with the meat since it seemed to have some spicy undertones to prevent this dish from being mediocre.  As for the potato wedges, they were thrown in with the gravy which I didn’t really care for since they ended up just disintegrating into the rest of the meal.  Nevertheless, it was quite filling, and I was thoroughly satisfied with my meal.

So the next time you are in Sevilla and want to try the best of something traditional or be a little more adventurous, the Cafe de Sevilla has a dish for everyone’s’ personal preferences.  However, this city has many great establishments to dine at in its tiny, winding streets, so follow the advice of a popular Spanish saying, “El perro que anda, hueso encuentra” (The dog that walks, finds the bone). This is only part one of two on places to go to eat in Sevilla.  Part two involves gelato, so get excited!

Looks Like Hell Can Freeze Over…Sort Of

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Hello all.  Welcome to another installation to Mastication Monologues.  I was looking over my blog as of late, and I was seriously slacking the past couple of months in terms of keeping up with my culinary adventures around the world.  Therefore, I am backtracking a bit, so bear with me.  Today I would like to tell you about an interesting restaurant called Chino Latino located at 2916 Hennepin Avenue South  Minneapolis, MN 55408.  It is located in a very nice part of the city, and there is ample street parking.

The fancy exterior of the restaurant

My girlfriend told me about this place awhile ago, so when I came up to visit we went there for dinner.  The decor is eclectic with different types of Latino and Asian artwork covering the walls of the entrance, i.e. papel picado from Dia de los Muertos and Thai shadow puppets .  Some of the pictures were borderline creepy, but I was here for the food, so I was ready to get down to business.  The interior of the actual dining room is two levels, but I did not care for the lighting.  It was too dark which made reading the menu a bit of a chore.  There’s a difference between mood lighting and trying to save on the electric bill.  Either that or I’m getting too old as I approach my quarter-life crisis.  Yet I digress once more, back to the food.

The interior of the restaurant

Even before I saw the menu, I knew that I was in for a treat as I saw that they had my favorite hot sauce on the table:  Yucateco Habanero salsa verde (Warning:  this sauce doesn’t mess around with people who think Pepper Jack cheese is spicy).  Our waitress was very helpful in explaining to me some of the different menu items, and the overall concept of their establishment which aims to deliver street food from countries which the Equator runs through.  As I looked over the different entrees, I was torn in many different directions by the different curries, satays, tacos, and noodles.  However, I was won over by a seemingly simple, borderline appetizer, dinner:  Habanero Hell Poppers.

One of the reasons why I chose this option from all of the others was the fact that there were three mini sticks of dynamite on the menu around the poppers.  Now, normally I take these “heat measurements” with a grain of salt and a good-natured chuckle since they are geared towards people who are not used to eating really spicy food.  However, since we were in an Equatorial restaurant I knew they’d be bringing the heat like their geographical location namesake, and I have a bit of a daredevil streak in me when it comes to food.  So when I ordered them, the waitress looked at me like I was a madman.  Always a good sign that you’re ordering a meal with some real cojones.  They came out on a medium-sized platter with four large poppers, a slice of lime, and a strange cup filled with an orange substance.  Upon closer inspection, there was a paper that came along with the food that in so many words states that if you complain about how spicy the poppers are, you’re going to be made fun of by the staff at Chino Latino and your friends.  Challenge accepted!

Great Balls of Fire!

I tucked into the poppers with gusto, and I finally found a spicy meal that lived up to all of the fanfare.  First off, it was hot temperature-wise.  The breading was light and airy and not greasy.  The Habanero peppers on the inside were fresh, and the Habanero infused cream cheese was hotter than napalm.  So, I would definitely let them cool off before you start wolfing them down.  The first one really started with a bang of spice along with a slightly acrid taste that comes along naturally with the skin of the Habanero.  By the time I finished the fourth and final popper, I definitely had the spicy food sweats; they’re not as scary as meat sweats but are definitely more painful.  However, I then tried the orange substance in the small ceramic cup, and it turned out to be blood orange sorbet.  It was like a plane dropping water on a moderate forest fire.  The embers were still smoldering, but the blaze was extinguished.  The actual sorbet was delicious with a light, even texture and a rich blood orange flavor.

So if you’re a fan of various types of Latino, Southeast, or Caribbean foods, check out Chino Latino in Minneapolis.  However, if you’re looking for a memorable dinner, try the Habanero Hell Poppers because as Kurt Cobain said, “It’s better to burn out than fade away”.

Chino Latino on Urbanspoon

Chino Latino on Foodio54

The Quay to a Man’s Heart Is Through His Stomach

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Hello everyone once again in the blogosphere to another addition to Mastication Monologues.  Unfortunately, it has been hotter than the inside of a Pepperoni Hot Pocket as of late in the Chicagoland area.  So while lurking about in my air-conditioned cocoon known as my house, I decided I might as well write about a delightful restaurant I visited a few weeks ago.  A friend, Maria Jose, was in town from New York, and she decided she wanted to try out this new place called Quay (pronounced “key” not “kway”; confusing, I know).  It is located at 465 East Illinois Street  Chicago, IL 60611 in the River East building.  Unbeknownst to me, I would be pleasantly surprised by her suggestion.

First, I was surprised at the location because I remember during my childhood the River East building being a hollow shell of an edifice mainly housing empty storefronts with the occasional video game arcade or art gallery, but it functioned mainly as a mooring hub for boats making their way out to the lake/Navy Pier.  Therefore, when I showed up to a buzzing and elegant restaurant with al fresco dining, I was gobsmacked.  There is valet parking for 12 dollars and is valid all night (I opted for this option), or you can park in the parking garage across the street.  As we entered, the decor of the restaurant was very sleek and modern with softer lighting in the bar area, and the staff were very friendly.

The main dining room.

We first split a bottle of Tangley Oaks, a Merlot from Napa which was a soft, full-bodied wine that was not too overwhelming (mind you, I am not a sommelier by any stretch of the imagination, but it was a pleasant compliment to my meal).  The menu boasted a variety of American options (steak, burgers), French cuisine (Tarte Flambe, Lamb au Poirve), and Italian cooking (Suckling Pig Porchetta, Insalata Caprese).  For dinner, I decided to order the Spring Risotto which contained fava beans, english peas, braised radish, spring onions pecorino pepato, and truffled nettle puree.  Unfortunately, I was unable to take a picture of this tiny masterpiece, but it was elegantly presented on a simple white plate along with a drizzling of olive oil and a very dark vinaigrette to provide a bit of slightly bitter bite to the risotto.  The actual rice dish was very nicely balanced as the rice was not too soggy which sometimes can happen to cream-based rice dishes.  Another part of the dish that I enjoyed was the fact that all of the ingredients weren’t simply assimilated into the flavor background.  The english peas were served whole and not mashed contrary to their English heritage.  I am a huge fan of onions, and the spring onions strangely gave the risotto a slightly sweet aftertaste now and then which made me excited to explore more of the nooks and crannies in this mini-mound of goodness.  The pecorino pepato (peppered Italian cheese for those of you who don’t parla italiano) was lightly grated in thin, snow-white slices and perched gently atop Montecello Risotto.   This cheese lived up to its peppery name, but it was not very spicy for those worried about mouth scorching foods.  Plus, the heat of the risotto melted the cheese slightly which made it easier to mix into the rice and integrate it with the other flavors on my palate.

Whilst I was greatly enjoying myself, my friend Maria Jose had a slightly different dining experience.  She ordered the Oven Roasted Sea Bass with a side of grilled asparagus as a substitution for the baby spinach at no extra charge.  Upon tucking into the verdant and evenly grilled and seasoned spears, she found a small amount of hair.  She brought this up to our waiter who was visibly disturbed at this discovery, but he was a gentleman about it and the manager apologized/covered Maria Jose’s meal.  Our waiter even went above and beyond general hospitality and allowed us access to the lounge/bar in the back section of the restaurant even though there was a private function.  It has a lovely view of the Chicago River along with very tasteful furniture and a classy bar area.

The spacious lounge at the back of the restaurant

Upon returning to our table, we finished our main courses and split one of their special desserts for the night:  ice cream sandwiches made with homemade dark chocolate cookies and banana gelato on the inside along with a side of raspberry compote.  These small sandwiches lived up to the Latin phrase “Multum in Parvo” (A lot of stuff in a little package).  They were probably only as big as silver dollars, but the chocolate from the cookies meshed perfectly with the banana gelato to create a classier version of eating frozen chocolate bananas on a stick.  The raspberries also served as a subtle contrast to these two sweet elements with a  slightly sour contribution to the dessert course.

On the whole, I would recommend Quay to anyone who is looking to try out a new restaurant/bar/lounge in the Streeterville area for  a lunch or dinner before Navy Pier, a pre-movie meal, or just looking for a new place to expand your gastronomic horizons.  Even if your visit may seem like it is teetering on the verge of becoming un Inferno like ours was, the helpful staff and delicious food can definitely leave you feeling like you’re in Paradiso.

but leave molto felice. Eyyyy!

You may come in as happy as Dante…

Quay on Urbanspoon

Three’s Happiness Too

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Hello to everyone out there in the blogosphere!  It has been a long time since I last posted on Mastication Monologues, but I have finally emerged from the madness is grad school (actually I’m only in the eye of the storm right now) to bring you a new post about a type of cuisine I have never truly experienced:  Dim Sum.

Mmm So delicious and MSG laden

When many people proclaim that they enjoy “Chinese food” and then proceed to rattle off such favorites as General Tso’s chicken, orange chicken, or sweet and sour chicken, this culinary adventure I embarked on was the furthest from these Panda Express concoctions.  Instead, my good friend David finally fulfilled a promise he made to me a long time ago that he would take me out to an authentic dim sum dinner, and yesterday we finally made it happen.

We ended up making our way down to Chinatown to Three Happiness Restaurant located at 2130 South Wentworth Avenue, Chicago, IL.  There is parking available nearby, and the establishment will validate your parking which eliminates a gigantic headache for anyone who has tried to find parking around the city.  It was an interesting/surprising coincidence that we were actually going to this specific Three Happiness because I had visited it on numerous occasions when I was just a young little spring roll and yet never had Dim Sum but rather the Pu-Pu platter (oh immature humor).

Poop jokes aside, we were promptly seated in the spacious and very clean dining room.  The wait staff was very helpful initially with providing us with drinks.  I say initially due to a minor incident later on in the meal that somewhat soured the experience, but spectacular food can always make up for service problems.  Now, the only previous experience I had with Dim Sum was in the basement of a YMCA during college with the Chinese Student Association, so I only knew of two or three types of plates you could order at Dim Sum.  However, my friend David explained Dim Sum perfectly by saying that there are many options to sample yet they’re portions that are just enough to share with friends kind of like tapas in Spain.  It was the perfect culinary storm as my love for sampling random foods combined with my affinity for tapas to create a wave of mass consumption that laid waste to all dumplings, cakes, and small watercraft on the table (OK, maybe not that last one).

The first round of Dim Sum consisted of turnip cakes, taro root puffs, sesame buns, and shrimp wraps.

Our waitress also provided us with a small bowl of chili sauce that looked very dangerous which made me happy.  I say happy because I love spicy food with a burning passion.  Unfortunately, often times I am disappointed by dishes in more mainstream restaurants that claim to be spicy but in reality are merely smouldering coals instead of raging infernos (i.e. any “spicy Southwest burger/spicy Asian stir fry/blazing chicken wings”).  However, realizing that I was in an authentic Chinese restaurant, I knew that they would be bringing the heat especially if I wanted to go Sichuan or get my favorite spicy mustard that makes me feel like I have Rocky Balboa inside my sinuses taking a left hook to the back of my nose.  As much as I would like to glorify the wonders of insanely spicy foods, I’m here to write about the Dim Sum.  I had already tried turnip cakes before, and the ones here were alright.  They were baked with a thin flaky crust and did not have much flavor aside from some potato-esque hints in the aftertaste.

The suspects in question going clockwise (turnip cakes, taro root puffs, shrimp wraps, and sesame buns)

The chili sauce definitely kicked them up a notch, Emeril-style BAM!.  The taro root puffs interested me as soon as I saw them on the menu, and I was not disappointed.  They looked like empanadas sporting very stiff Jheri curls, and biting into one felt like munching on a pine-cone but without the sap/pain and instead a delicious deep-fried flavor.  The inside surprised me the most where there was a meat and black bean concoction that was piping hot and quite savory with a flavor that could be most likened to a traditional meatloaf sans ketchup.  The shrimp wraps were brought to our table and had a dark brown fish sauce poured over them to provide more flavor, and it nicely complimented the cooked shrimp sleeping underneath their tender rice dough sheets.  I saved the best for last:  the sesame buns.  For some reason, a lot of great food comes in orb form like handmade doughnut holes or even pão de queijo(cheese bread) in Brazilian cuisine, and these sesame buns are no different.  They are roughly the size of a golf ball, coated in sesame seeds, and are firm with a semi-sticky texture when you bite into them.  The inside also contains a dab of red bean paste, but before you ready your barf bags, fickle eaters, I have to let you know that the paste actually carries a semi-sweet, almost vanilla wafer quality to it.  Satisfied with my first round of Dim Sum, we had a second helping.

Fried Calamari

The second round of Dim Sum delights entailed fried calamari, shrimp toast, beef and pork dumplings, and chicken feet.  My friend David order the fried calamari with sea salt which made me a bit wary since calamari seems to be more of a hit or miss dish from my experiences.  However, I was pleasantly surprised as the squid was tender and the batter was light and was adequately assisted by the sea salt to bring the squid back to its briny roots.  I did not know what to expect with the shrimp toast which led me to be pleasantly surprised when it confirmed some of my suspicions with a twist.  The shrimp was served whole on top of a slice of bread (like I assumed), but then the whole piece was completely fried which naturally made everything taste fantastic.  The beef and pork dumplings were nothing too special with the latter being encased in a thin casing of rice dough and the former looked like meatballs nestled in small pieces of cabbage that actually were chartreuse pieces of dough.  The presentation was very nice, and both of the meats were adequately seasoned and in harmony with the starch.  Once again, the last Dim Sum choice was the most interesting:  the chicken feet.

A quartet of delights going clockwise (beef dumplings, chicken feet, pork dumplings, shrimp toast)

Throughout my food expeditions both in the States and abroad, I have eaten various parts of animals, but I had never tried chicken feet.  David informed me that in Chinese, they are literally referred to as “Phoenix talons” (talk about a good marketing scheme through linguistics!), and thankfully they lived up to their fancy name.  They were baked in a soy based sauce that had some sweet elements to give the meat a slight barbecue flavor with prominent black pepper overtones.  The actual meat was juicy, falling off the metatarsal, finger-lickin’ good.  However, contrary to American customs of deboning any type of meat fit for human consumption (pink slime aside), the Chinese and many other cultures leave all of the bones in their meats to contain the various flavors obtained through the marrow and minerals.  Ergo, beware of the tiny bones lurking in the feet!

Jello Jigglers eat your heart out

The final movement to our Dim Sum symphony ended with mango pudding which was less like Jello and more like a tropical fruit version of flan without the pool of caramel.  Unfortunately, there was a mix-up with our order since we wanted BBQ pork buns for the end of the meal, and they said they were on the way.  However, we had to wait at least twenty minutes before they realized that they had made a mistake which kind of put a damper on the experience.  Nevertheless, they eventually brought out the BBQ pork buns, and they were well worth the wait.  The dough was thick and pliable, and the pork was neatly cubed and lodged within the dumpling surrounded by a sweet bbq sauce that most likely had a molasses base.

Definitely pigged out on these pork buns

In the end, I was greatly satisfied with my Dim Sum experience at Three Happiness.  If you are tired of the same old egg roll and fried rice dinner at your local Chinese restaurant, go outside your comfort zone and try some Dim Sum if you have the opportunity to do so.  My fortune at the end of the meal definitely came true, and I hope you find your own new adventures and foodie pleasures!

It came to fruition!

Three Happiness on Urbanspoon

High Steaks Dining (Somehow I Survived)

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A quick turnaround for my dear old blog, but here is another entry in the Mastication Monologues saga.  Today was no ordinary day since I actually didn’t feel like reverting back to my old tried and true haunts and ethnic cuisines.  Perhaps it was the sudden change in the weather which can only be likened to a drop from a blazing furnace to a sudden chill like a cold soda can to the back of your neck, or maybe I just wanted some STEAK being the natural carnivore that I am.  Luckily, I didn’t have to look any further than Al’s Charhouse located at 32 S. LaGrange Rd.  La Grange, IL 60525. which is right in the heart of bustling downtown LaGrange.

Upon arriving, I realized that I had been in this building many times before, but I had only visited Al’s latino counterpart on the upper level, Casa Margarita (another delicious Mexican eatery, fyi).  This time would be quite different as we descended the very large staircase to the entrance (I’m not quite sure how this would work out for those who are handicapped).  Immediately I knew they were going to play up their ties to the Wild West with plenty of cowboy and rancher paraphernalia adorning the walls.  The staff was quite cheerful, and we were waited upon right away.

People are really helpful around here

Yes, that is a rifle for a door handle.

Plus, there didn’t seem to be a strict dress code which was a nice change for a steak house.  As soon as we sat down, I realized this steakhouse was immediately different because the booths  actually had pillows for backrests which definitely made the dinner extra relaxing, and I later found out that their menus were called billboards because they literally covered up the width of the table when placed flat (cue an “everything’s bigger in Texas” joke haw haw)

We started off by ordering the spinach and artichoke dip that was accompanied by tortilla chips for dipping.  Due to my extreme hunger, I ended up finishing it all, but it was not anything special.  The cheese was quite bland, and the artichokes were a bit overdone.  On the plus side, the tortilla chips were very fresh, crisp, and not overly salty.  However, I just wasn’t wowed by it.  Luckily, the next course quickly changed my mind.

They soon brought out my mom’s French onion soup that I sampled along with my standard complimentary salad which comes with any sandwich or burger. The soup was a clear improvement on the aforementioned appetizer because it was adorned with a corona of ample, gooey cheese, a thoroughly soaked crust of bread lurked within the bowl, and a savory broth that melded these two different textures together into a semi-salty ambrosia.  Another noteworthy complimentary feature that stood out during this culinary interlude was the bread they provided:  a loaf of dark rye sans caraway seeds that were instead replaced by raisins and almonds.  It seemed like an odd concept at first, but the fact that they had cinnamon butter finally put the whole concept in perspective (almost like one of those 3-D pictures you can see once you step back and cross your eyes a bit).  Anyway, that loaf did not last long as the warm, expertly crafted bread was pulled apart faster than a pack of ravenous dogs attacking a giant Snausage.   Thus set the stage for the final act…the mega sandwich.

French Onion or Freedom Onion?

This Filet Bleu sandwich had four of my many favorite food elements for any meal:  steak (can never go wrong), garlic, cheese, and bread.  Unfortunately, all of the other previous food had filled me up to question whether or not I could finish off this monstrous plate of food.  Naturally, I said, “Damn, stomach integrity!”

and went straight into this mini-hubcap of a sandwich, au jus and all.  Best decision ever.  The bun, which is actually garlic bread on the inside, was very fresh and did not have either the overpowering buttery/garlicky taste or the crumb shower that normally accompanies typical garlic bread.  Instead, the garlic from the bun transitioned smoothly to the sultry blue cheese which whispered sweet nothings into my ear as I headed straight for the good stuff, the steak.

A platter for the Steak Gods

This very liberal helping of superbly grilled and seasoned steak medallions were succulent and tender enough to allow a clean bite all the way though.  The understated au jus also served as a culinary foil for the steak to shout its full flavor out to the world on the top of my taste-buds.  I also tried some of the fry wedges that came with the sandwich, and they were expertly made with a crunchy exterior that led to an oh-so creamy center.  Sadly, I could only make it half-way through the sandwich before I had to throw in the towel after this gastronomic decathlon, but I can’t help thinking that I was happy to have made the journey.

So if you’re looking for a lot of great, down home cuisine and want to feel like you’re in the middle of Texas while doing it, come down to Al’s Charhouse.  Believe me, Southern comfort and scrumptious cooking are not dead at this establishment.

Al's Char-house Steak House on Urbanspoon

Al's Char-House Banquets on Foodio54

Smash and Grab Burg(er)lary

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The Incredible Hulk has always been part of American culture (however geeky some might deem it) for many reasons.  Whether it was his oh so natural green hue or his very chic tatters that have that pre-worn appeal that many hobos and drifters could identify with, but his severe anger problems were probably what catapulted him to the front of the superhero pantheon.  With a Neanderthalic  grammatical utterance of, “HULK SMASH!” we could all identify with him when we just wanted to rip our clothes off and go crazy when the life is getting us down (maybe less of the former than the latter, actually).  What I’m trying to get is that, I definitely went crazy for Smashburger’s food sans the searing rage of my aforementioned friend.  This small and smart establishment has locations all over the United States, but the one I visited is located at 2425 W 75th St Darien, IL 60561.

A Pretty Hip Burger Joint

Even though their sign outside looked oddly like Gamestop’s, I walked into a nicely decorated restaurant that had a very casual vibe going for it.  The staff was very attentive and even offered to explain any questions we had with the menu or the company in general.  I ended up ordering the build your own burger with the Big Smash option which is a full 1/2 pounds of black Angus beef that is freshly prepared in the kitchen.

As for the ingredients, I definitely went all out as always with my options as I managed to create a souped up burger with the following ingredients:  a spicy chipotle bun, lettuce, tomato, red onion, grilled onion, kosher pickles (Shalom, y’all!), jalapeños, ketchup, mustard, spicy chipotle mayo, bbq sauce, buffalo sauce, and blue cheese.

A Veritable Laundry List of Toppings

All of which ended up looking like a monster of a burger that the Hulk would identify with, slightly odd-looking but a good one at heart.  Upon sinking my teeth into this beefy leviathan, I knew that I had made the right choice with going with the large burger and not the other options on the menu like the various salads, chicken sandwiches, or specialty burgers.

The beef was tender, juicy, cooked to perfection, but did not overpower the rest of the ingredients.  The spicy chipotle bun was something that I had never seen before, but it certainly made an impact on the overall flavor of the burger because with every enjoyable chomp, there were subtle smoky/spicy whisps of flavor caressing my tongue.

Cheesewise, the blue cheese was surprisingly measured out to support the other players in the sandwich; all of which surprised me because most restaurants slather their blue cheese on burgers like it’s going out of style (not always a bad idea), but one can have too much of a good thing sometimes.  The one other element of the burger that definitely made me stand up and give a rousing ovation was the jalapenos.  Now, I love those “Southwest/New Mexico/Insert general burger name invoking a capsaicin nightmare” burgers, but I’ve found that the jalapeños on these burgers are soggy and just mush into the general melange of ingredients.

This Looks Good Enough to be Mayor McCheese’s Wife

This was not the case with Smashburger.  The jalapeños on my burger were a lush, verdant green like Señor Hulk, looked to be freshly hand chopped, and provided a satisfying crunch and a spicy peck on the cheek with every bite.

Tackling the Beast

As always, my appetite had not been satiated, so I decided to get a side that I’ve never tried before.  The fried pickles were beckoning me, but I decided not to go the Snooki route this time (though you must try them if you ever have the chance).  Instead, I chose the Smashfries which were french fries  tossed with garlic, rosemary, and olive oil.  These golden, finely julienned potatoes had me at garlic.  They did not disappoint because they were not too overpowering with the garlic, and thankfully the fries were fried to perfection with a light semi-crunch as I plowed my way through the mini-basket (way better than the over-salted/over-seasoned Five Guys fries, I think).  For all those who enjoy a bit of spice in their food, I’d recommend trying their Cholula hot sauce on these fries to make a new American favorite that is mixed with Mediterranean ingredients and a little Latin panache.

Les Pommes Frites Avec Un Twist

Smashburger was a worthwhile experience for those who are looking for a good burger beyond Five Guys, Meatheads, the King, the Golden Arches, or any other place for that matter.  As I left the restaurant feeling thoroughly satisfied, I wish I could have tried more items, but unfortunately like my gargantuan pal, I’ll have to wait for next time whilst I drove into the sunset.  *Cue sad Hulk theme song*

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